I must admit my general lack of patience had me more than a little irritated when I finally arrived at the Atlanta Greek Festival. After parking in an office park a mile and a half from the cathedral where the festival took place (the only place to park legally for free), then waiting in line for at least 10 minutes for the shuttle bus to the festival, I was not pleased to find that there was another line to purchase admission tickets (albeit a short one), then yet another line to buy food tickets (most of the stands did not take cash).
While this multiple-line, multiple-ticket system seemed overly complicated for a fairly small outside festival, my annoyance dissipated when I finally met up with my friends and one of them offered me what she couldn’t finish of her Greek potatoes. One bite of a perfectly-seasoned, crunchy-on-the-outside, soft-on-the-inside potato wedge dipped in creamy, tangy tzatziki (cucumber-yogurt) sauce and I was sold. The ridiculously complicated arrival and ticketing process had been more than worth it.
Armed with $16.00 worth of food/beverage tickets, I was ready for more. Normally I like to take my time with any menu and make sure I make the perfect choice, especially when faced with a long list of exotic items I can’t even pronounce. But in this case my friends’ enthusiastic praises for the gyros they had just inhaled after their morning workout was enough convincing for me. As I fought the crowd to the much-hyped gyro stand, I thought back on my previous experiences with gyros. I’d had a few juicy, full-flavored ones in my day, but the majority had been made with chicken and on the bland side.
“It’s chicken, right?” I asked my pals, still not convinced that these things could be as satisfying as they suggested.
My ears perked up and my mouth began to water when they chuckled and informed me that the gyros had actually been made with a tasty, but mysterious, meat. Mystery meat – my absolute fave!!!
While I generally find mystery meat to be the most flavorful meat of them all, this one took me over the top. My huge $6.00 gyro was stuffed with a thinly-cut, brown meat that tasted like meatballs sans the tomato sauce. I was in heaven. With traditional music blaring in the background, the soft pita bread, glorious mystery meat and crisp tomatoes, onions and lettuce joined hands in my mouth and showed my taste buds how to get down Greek style. Opa! I’ve officially changed my future honeymoon destination from Italy to Greece (hope my future fiancé doesn’t mind).
While the rest of my time at the festival proved to be an enjoyable way to spend a summer-like Saturday in October, nothing after this point compared to my euphoric encounter with a food I’d had so many times before but had never truly experienced the way the Greek gods intended. I poured over some art, jewelry and religious relics for sale. I sipped on a strong, yet smooth, Greek iced coffee. I watched the “house” band belt out some time-honored tunes, and some adorable children in ancestral garb uncomfortably lock arms and rock back and forth with school-picture smiles plastered on their faces.
In typical fashion, my eyes had been bigger than my stomach when I arrived, and I still had a pile of tickets to spend before I got in line for the return shuttle bus. What’s a stuffed-to-the-max girl to do? Well, I hadn’t yet experienced a single morsel of the myriad pastries available for the tasting, so a to-go box of baklava was definitely in order. If I’d still been hungry I definitely would have gone for the innovative baklava sundae, crunchy pieces of the super-sweet dessert crumbled over a huge scoop of good, old vanilla ice cream. But such is life. With still a few tickets in hand, I decided that my football-fiend boyfriend would enjoy a nice stack of zesty potatoes to enjoy on the couch when I got home. (I was right.)
Finally ticket-less and tuckered out, I got back on the bus and reflected on the day’s adventure. Overall, it was worth the $3.00 entrance fee to be able to cross the Greek festival off of the long list of Atlanta festivals I’ve attended during my 3½ years in town. And of course that gyro will give me sweet dreams for weeks (some people dream about love, romance and foreign lands, I dream about food).
But will I attend next year? Absolutely not.
You see, the kind folks who organize the festival have made it so that I never have to take their shuttle again. This year, I came, I saw, I conquered. Next year, I will be taking full advantage of the festival’s food drive-thru, most likely visiting it more than once throughout the weekend. If available, I will be ordering the exact same delights I became one with this year – and of course extra tzatziki sauce to slather over everything. Yes, maybe even on the baklava. It’s that good!
Until then, I will be stalking down every Greek restaurant and stand in town, hoping to find something that’s a close match to what my palate was treated to today. Sadly, though, I’m thinking the success of this mission will be minimal at best.
Additional information on the Atlanta Greek Festival and its phenomenal fare can be found at: http://atlantagreekfestival.org
*** Anyone with food knowledge or familiar with Greek culture will be relieved to know that shortly after writing this I eventually deduced that the mystery meat in my gyro was lamb, aka the best meat of all time. Since this first glorious gyro encounter, I’m quite sure I’ve eaten an entire lamb’s worth of gyros. I’ve been able to find gyros that are just as magical as the one described above at various locations including Astoria, Queens where many Greeks make their residence and in Atlanta’s own Avra on Juniper in Midtown. I have not, however, come in contact with any potatoes like the ones at the Greek Festival, and the other tzatziki sauces I’ve tried have paled in comparison. Until next year… ***
Friday, November 2, 2007
With a name like Einstein’s, I didn’t expect ordinary
After viewing the Annie Leibovitz exhibit at the High Museum one Sunday, my friend and I sought a nearby, moderately priced spot to grab an early dinner and ended up at the long-time Midtown staple, Einstein’s. While the inside furnishings looked comfy and trendy, we opted for sitting outside on the patio because the air conditioning inside felt uncomfortably cold against the 90+ degree day.
Growing up, I had a frog pond in my backyard. That is what the outside seating area of Einstein’s smelled like. Hoping the funky smell would dwindle and that I’d get used to the blaring pop selections coming from a speaker above our heads, I excitedly dove into the inventive menu. Being food- and restaurant-obsessed, I’d poured over the mouth-watering items on the online menu a few times in the past, but had not yet experienced (according to the Web site) Einstein’s “innovative, competitively-priced cuisine in a warm, accommodating environment” or its “award-winning patio.”
The Einstein’s menu is truly genius, living up to the establishment’s moniker. The restaurant features unexpected twists on traditional items like club sandwiches and quesadillas, adding cheeky ingredients such as raspberry sauce and duck, respectively. While painstakingly deliberating over the menu (everything looked divine), I threw in an order for lemonade and waited in anticipation to see how Einstein’s would take my simple beverage to the next level.
Finally I settled on the skirt steak sandwich topped with a fried egg, arugula, enoki mushrooms and aioli, served on a foccacia bun. “With fries?” the waiter assumed. When I learned that I could pick any side from the list of 10 creative options, my excitement topped the charts. I picked the most exotic of course, jicama watermelon slaw. Other options included spicy cucumber salad, sweet potato fries, green beans with caramelized onions and a number of more traditional veggies and starches like black beans & rice and garlic mashed potatoes.
No longer distracted by the enticing menu, the pond smell once again entered the scene as Kelly Clarkson very loudly belted out “Since You’ve Been Gone.” I turned to my lemonade for solace, but was disappointed when it tasted a little bit worse than a generic, grocery store powdered drink mix. I tried to keep my spirits up, but I was losing the battle as I strained to hear my friend talk over Miss Clarkson.
Upon request, the waiter cheerfully turned the speakers down as he brought the appetizer my friend ordered – artichoke-parmesan dip. Although there was a grossly disproportionate amount of chips compared to the tiny bowl of dip, the chips were a vivid blue and covered in what looked like chili powder, so I hoped they could hold their own in flavor once the dip was devoured. Unfortunately they did not, and the dip – while tasty and exactly what you’d expect – disappeared even sooner than I thought it would due to several whole chunks of artichoke taking up room in the small dish. Oh well, on to the entrees…
My friend delighted in her Einstein Grille, essentially a turkey club sandwich served on french toast made with sourdough bread. Too full to eat the second half of the huge sandwich, she resorted to dipping the bread in the raspberry sauce served on the side and had a berry good time with it.
Meanwhile, my jicama watermelon slaw made me frown. Seeing jicama, browned apple slices and shredded cabbage on my plate, I went on an expedition to uncover said watermelon and only managed to find two pink flecks so small I could hardly taste them. Overall, the slaw mostly tasted like salt water, with no detectable dressing. My practical dining buddy took the waiter’s suggestion and got the french fries alongside her sandwich. While not exotic, they were pretty much perfect.
The skirt steak sandwich was much more appealing to the eye than my brown and green slaw, and was gigantic like my friend’s turkey sandwich. I cut it in half and went in for the kill. The tastes blended very well together – like a full-flavored steak and eggs breakfast in sandwich form. The steak and eggs were definitely the most powerful flavors coming through in each bite, followed closely by a spicy kick from the arugula and some rosemary in the foccacia bread (a welcome surprise). While I could not really pinpoint the exact flavors in the aioli, it definitely enhanced the overall essence of the sandwich by adding a salty bite. As for the mushrooms, I’m not sure I tasted them at all, but they sure make the sandwich sound fancy on the menu.
Overall I was rather pleased with the skirt steak sandwich, though I did have one major reservation. By the time I got to the last few bites, I was so sick of fighting to bite the steak and picking it out of my teeth that I just took the steak out and ate the egg and bread. In order to improve the texture and user-friendliness of the sandwich, I’d suggest that Einstein’s either uses a less fatty cut of steak (I know, I know, that would cost more) or pre-cut the steak before putting it onto the sandwich.
When it came time for that time-honored question, “to dessert or not to dessert,” I opted for not. The dessert menu looked delectable but mostly ordinary, including (among others) treats like key lime pie, cheesecake, a fudge sundae and chocolate mousse cake. The one stand-out item to me was the Georgia peach pound cake with bourbon-caramel sauce. However, having given my gigantic sandwich a full chance to impress me (slash having no self control) I had finished almost all of it except for those last few pesky bits of chewy steak. And besides that, my hands were covered with aioli and egg goo (it wasn’t a neat sandwich), and I’d had enough of the swamp stench.
Would I return to Einstein’s? Well, let’s see…
- Yellow powdered mix drink…$1.95 (free refills if you’re that thirsty)
- Thin, tasteless blue tortilla chips with a few scrumptious (yet typical) bites of artichoke dip…$8.00 ($4.00 for me because I split it)
- A few nibbles of seawater-salty slaw and a hunka, hunka tasty steak and eggs between sinfully delicious rosemary bread…$11.00
- Frog-pond fragrance…priceless!
Weighing in at about $22 a piece when all was said and done, Einstein’s is by no means expensive by Midtown dining standards. However, next time I’m in the area and feigning for no-nonsense food with a splash of creativity, I’ll most likely head over to The Vortex on Peachtree and 7th where I’ve never had a bad meal.
Being a Rachael Ray in training, I couldn’t help but notice Einstein’s 5 & 10 menu though. On Monday through Friday from 3-6pm or after 10pm, the restaurant offers some selections from its menu for $5.00 and others for $10.00. If I’m ever in the area and in need of a cheap meal during those times, I may venture back to Einstein’s to try once again to uncover the genius, but I wouldn’t pay more than $5.00. I will, however, be sure to bring a heavy sweater and sit inside. With the Trump Tower going up, there’s not much to see from the patio right now anyway except for a lot of construction.
Growing up, I had a frog pond in my backyard. That is what the outside seating area of Einstein’s smelled like. Hoping the funky smell would dwindle and that I’d get used to the blaring pop selections coming from a speaker above our heads, I excitedly dove into the inventive menu. Being food- and restaurant-obsessed, I’d poured over the mouth-watering items on the online menu a few times in the past, but had not yet experienced (according to the Web site) Einstein’s “innovative, competitively-priced cuisine in a warm, accommodating environment” or its “award-winning patio.”
The Einstein’s menu is truly genius, living up to the establishment’s moniker. The restaurant features unexpected twists on traditional items like club sandwiches and quesadillas, adding cheeky ingredients such as raspberry sauce and duck, respectively. While painstakingly deliberating over the menu (everything looked divine), I threw in an order for lemonade and waited in anticipation to see how Einstein’s would take my simple beverage to the next level.
Finally I settled on the skirt steak sandwich topped with a fried egg, arugula, enoki mushrooms and aioli, served on a foccacia bun. “With fries?” the waiter assumed. When I learned that I could pick any side from the list of 10 creative options, my excitement topped the charts. I picked the most exotic of course, jicama watermelon slaw. Other options included spicy cucumber salad, sweet potato fries, green beans with caramelized onions and a number of more traditional veggies and starches like black beans & rice and garlic mashed potatoes.
No longer distracted by the enticing menu, the pond smell once again entered the scene as Kelly Clarkson very loudly belted out “Since You’ve Been Gone.” I turned to my lemonade for solace, but was disappointed when it tasted a little bit worse than a generic, grocery store powdered drink mix. I tried to keep my spirits up, but I was losing the battle as I strained to hear my friend talk over Miss Clarkson.
Upon request, the waiter cheerfully turned the speakers down as he brought the appetizer my friend ordered – artichoke-parmesan dip. Although there was a grossly disproportionate amount of chips compared to the tiny bowl of dip, the chips were a vivid blue and covered in what looked like chili powder, so I hoped they could hold their own in flavor once the dip was devoured. Unfortunately they did not, and the dip – while tasty and exactly what you’d expect – disappeared even sooner than I thought it would due to several whole chunks of artichoke taking up room in the small dish. Oh well, on to the entrees…
My friend delighted in her Einstein Grille, essentially a turkey club sandwich served on french toast made with sourdough bread. Too full to eat the second half of the huge sandwich, she resorted to dipping the bread in the raspberry sauce served on the side and had a berry good time with it.
Meanwhile, my jicama watermelon slaw made me frown. Seeing jicama, browned apple slices and shredded cabbage on my plate, I went on an expedition to uncover said watermelon and only managed to find two pink flecks so small I could hardly taste them. Overall, the slaw mostly tasted like salt water, with no detectable dressing. My practical dining buddy took the waiter’s suggestion and got the french fries alongside her sandwich. While not exotic, they were pretty much perfect.
The skirt steak sandwich was much more appealing to the eye than my brown and green slaw, and was gigantic like my friend’s turkey sandwich. I cut it in half and went in for the kill. The tastes blended very well together – like a full-flavored steak and eggs breakfast in sandwich form. The steak and eggs were definitely the most powerful flavors coming through in each bite, followed closely by a spicy kick from the arugula and some rosemary in the foccacia bread (a welcome surprise). While I could not really pinpoint the exact flavors in the aioli, it definitely enhanced the overall essence of the sandwich by adding a salty bite. As for the mushrooms, I’m not sure I tasted them at all, but they sure make the sandwich sound fancy on the menu.
Overall I was rather pleased with the skirt steak sandwich, though I did have one major reservation. By the time I got to the last few bites, I was so sick of fighting to bite the steak and picking it out of my teeth that I just took the steak out and ate the egg and bread. In order to improve the texture and user-friendliness of the sandwich, I’d suggest that Einstein’s either uses a less fatty cut of steak (I know, I know, that would cost more) or pre-cut the steak before putting it onto the sandwich.
When it came time for that time-honored question, “to dessert or not to dessert,” I opted for not. The dessert menu looked delectable but mostly ordinary, including (among others) treats like key lime pie, cheesecake, a fudge sundae and chocolate mousse cake. The one stand-out item to me was the Georgia peach pound cake with bourbon-caramel sauce. However, having given my gigantic sandwich a full chance to impress me (slash having no self control) I had finished almost all of it except for those last few pesky bits of chewy steak. And besides that, my hands were covered with aioli and egg goo (it wasn’t a neat sandwich), and I’d had enough of the swamp stench.
Would I return to Einstein’s? Well, let’s see…
- Yellow powdered mix drink…$1.95 (free refills if you’re that thirsty)
- Thin, tasteless blue tortilla chips with a few scrumptious (yet typical) bites of artichoke dip…$8.00 ($4.00 for me because I split it)
- A few nibbles of seawater-salty slaw and a hunka, hunka tasty steak and eggs between sinfully delicious rosemary bread…$11.00
- Frog-pond fragrance…priceless!
Weighing in at about $22 a piece when all was said and done, Einstein’s is by no means expensive by Midtown dining standards. However, next time I’m in the area and feigning for no-nonsense food with a splash of creativity, I’ll most likely head over to The Vortex on Peachtree and 7th where I’ve never had a bad meal.
Being a Rachael Ray in training, I couldn’t help but notice Einstein’s 5 & 10 menu though. On Monday through Friday from 3-6pm or after 10pm, the restaurant offers some selections from its menu for $5.00 and others for $10.00. If I’m ever in the area and in need of a cheap meal during those times, I may venture back to Einstein’s to try once again to uncover the genius, but I wouldn’t pay more than $5.00. I will, however, be sure to bring a heavy sweater and sit inside. With the Trump Tower going up, there’s not much to see from the patio right now anyway except for a lot of construction.
Puerto Vallarta – Part Paradise, Part Playground…All Good
I was dollared to death in Puerto Vallarta, but when I died I went to heaven.
If you’re someone who gets easily irritated by the infamous “hard sell,” Puerto Vallarta may not be for you. Literally the instant we passed through customs into the airport lobby, my boyfriend and I were greeted with a warm, welcoming local who wanted to “give us some advice and tips” for vacationing in PV (slash sign us up for a timeshare presentation). Not quite hip to this game yet, we lucked out in that this particular timeshare salesman just happened to be affiliated with the resort we were already staying at, so we scored a free cab ride from the airport as a result of this conversation.
Having no idea what to expect, my excitement rose as our cab winded up the hill to our accommodations. The Club Regina lobby was picture-perfect and just about took my breath away. The vibrant hot pink and yellow of the open-air lobby complemented the spectacular canvas of multiple pools, countless palms swaying in the wind, green mountains covered in mist and blue ocean as far as the eye could see.
Having been alerted to our arrival by our friend at the airport, another timeshare representative soon made her way over to us as we were checking in. Club Regina is a timeshare property. We were staying here because my boyfriend owned a timeshare at another location and (bless his heart) traded in his week for a week in Puerto Vallarta. But that did not change the fact that Club Regina’s timeshare reps wanted us to see their presentation, because after all, we could switch our timeshare to their property.
Promises of free and discounted tours, and the assurance that the presentation would be only 90 minutes long, encouraged us to appease our friendly greeters and sign up. Now on to bigger and better things – did I hear free drinks? Our room wasn’t quite ready when we arrived, but that didn’t matter since we had an extensive resort activities schedule to study and, of course, I had a free (delicious) pina colada to sip and savor.
If you’re someone who gets easily irritated by the infamous “hard sell,” Puerto Vallarta may not be for you. Literally the instant we passed through customs into the airport lobby, my boyfriend and I were greeted with a warm, welcoming local who wanted to “give us some advice and tips” for vacationing in PV (slash sign us up for a timeshare presentation). Not quite hip to this game yet, we lucked out in that this particular timeshare salesman just happened to be affiliated with the resort we were already staying at, so we scored a free cab ride from the airport as a result of this conversation.
Having no idea what to expect, my excitement rose as our cab winded up the hill to our accommodations. The Club Regina lobby was picture-perfect and just about took my breath away. The vibrant hot pink and yellow of the open-air lobby complemented the spectacular canvas of multiple pools, countless palms swaying in the wind, green mountains covered in mist and blue ocean as far as the eye could see.
Having been alerted to our arrival by our friend at the airport, another timeshare representative soon made her way over to us as we were checking in. Club Regina is a timeshare property. We were staying here because my boyfriend owned a timeshare at another location and (bless his heart) traded in his week for a week in Puerto Vallarta. But that did not change the fact that Club Regina’s timeshare reps wanted us to see their presentation, because after all, we could switch our timeshare to their property.
Promises of free and discounted tours, and the assurance that the presentation would be only 90 minutes long, encouraged us to appease our friendly greeters and sign up. Now on to bigger and better things – did I hear free drinks? Our room wasn’t quite ready when we arrived, but that didn’t matter since we had an extensive resort activities schedule to study and, of course, I had a free (delicious) pina colada to sip and savor.
Our room was not the type we thought we were getting. Club Regina’s web site boasts that all rooms have balconies equipped with Jacuzzis. Ours was sans Jacuzzi, but it was hard to be too disappointed in such a cutesy room with vibrant Mexican art and an amazing view of the marina. The room was like Disney World meets paradise, which is right up my alley. After a few nights in this room, the hotel staff graciously switched us to a room with a Jacuzzi as soon as one became available. Since the décor was a little different in the second room, I was actually glad I’d gotten to see both.
Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not always Miss Happy-Go-Lucky. In fact, I’m usually the opposite, but something about Puerto Vallarta really helped me focus on the positive for most of the trip – and positives there are many. However, I’d be lying if I didn’t divulge that there were a few times in PV where I did lose my cool. For instance, the first time we were walking on the gorgeous marina to troll for souvenirs in its plethora of shops, my blood started to boil after we were stopped by the fourth or fifth person trying to sign us up for another timeshare presentation. We actually had a limited amount of time to walk the marina before attending the presentation we’d already signed up for, and I didn’t want to waste it by stopping for a “hey amigos!” and sales pitch every 10 feet. My much more patient boyfriend was able to calm me down, however, by reminding me that we had a whole week in PV and could return to the marina as much as we wanted.
The presentation at Club Regina, I’m sorry to say, did not help my agitation. While the free lunch was tasty, I had wished it was Mexican instead of an American chicken, potato and vegetable spread. And that 90 minute promise was a total joke. After three hours of listening to the sales pitch, I bailed for the pool and let my boyfriend hear the rest of it on our behalf (again, bless his heart).
The ambiance at the pool erased all hard feelings I’d started to form against good, old Regina. The water in all three pools was glistening, the tropical music was pumping and the smell emanating from the poolside bar & grill was tantalizing. I slipped onto one of the built-in lounge chairs in the pool and let all remaining tension float away.
It was at this point that the trip went from enjoyable to amazing. Being in PV in off-season (late spring to early summer when it rains just a bit), we did get extra attention from all of the various salespeople. From timeshare properties and hotels to restaurants, tour guides and souvenir shops, everywhere we went we were beckoned to “come inside” and “look around.” However, the extra attention did work to our advantage on more than one occasion. On our first trip into downtown Puerto Vallarta (about a 15 minute bus ride from the marina area), we were treated to the most spectacular table in the restaurant, Viejo Vallarta. Munching on a mouth-watering platter of Mexican favorites including tacos, enchiladas and chili rellenos, the view from the second floor of this restaurant down to the bustling malecon (boardwalk), made the food taste even sweeter. The entertainment was non-stop as we watched tourists pose in front of the famous sea horse statue and the “flying pole dancers” climb to the top of a pole equipped with a series of ropes and float back down to the ground maypole style. A twinge of annoyance set in when one of the flyers actually walked into the restaurant to collect tips, but it soon dissipated when my eyes met a stunning, orange sunset transitioning the malecon from a bustling family tourist attraction to a hip nightlife scene with every type of club you could imagine.
Unfortunately for us, we picked the wrong club. The gregarious young men who served as activities directors at Club Regina talked us into buying some tickets from them for “the best club in Puerto Vallarta,” called Christine. Luckily, we did not have cash on us by the pool and arranged to pay them later. This definitely worked in our favor because after 30 minutes of having my eardrums assaulted by Bon Jovi as I watched droves of bikini-clad 19-year-olds pour in, I had no intention of paying the $30 US each we were asked for to enter this “amazing” club. I recommend that these otherwise amiable activities directors stick to their day jobs – leading fun games of poolside trivia and bingo and teaching us how to salsa dance and make piñatas – and leave the nightlife alone.
Despite the excruciating three hours, the timeshare presentation worked in our favor in the long run when we scored perks like free access to the immaculate, well-equipped
Club Regina gym (I even worked out once!), as well as free and discounted tours around the city. The free tour was mostly another sales trap that left the paying customers quite disgruntled. Stopping at a series of places to buy things – a candy cart, a high-priced silver purveyor and a ridiculously high-priced lunch stop – there were few individuals who decided to stick with the bus tour for its entirety. For us, though, having not paid for the tour itself, the $70 lunch bill wasn’t quite as mortifying, and I’d be wrong if I didn’t admit that the platter of ribs, tacos, steak and other hearty Mexican fare wasn’t finger-lickin’ good.
The tour was also a great opportunity for a change of pace. In the bus, we were able to ride up to the Romantic Zone, which we otherwise would not have known even existed. It is here where the rich and famous choose to play when they’re in town, and it is also the scene of various movie filmings. Situated high atop a hill overlooking the turquoise ocean and a series of giant stone arches (los arcos) jutting out of the water, I can see why. Having also gotten a free tequila tasting out of this tour (mmmm – chocolate tequila), and paid just 50 cents or so for the sweetest piece of candy I’ve ever tasted (guava flavored), I was a happy camper.
Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not always Miss Happy-Go-Lucky. In fact, I’m usually the opposite, but something about Puerto Vallarta really helped me focus on the positive for most of the trip – and positives there are many. However, I’d be lying if I didn’t divulge that there were a few times in PV where I did lose my cool. For instance, the first time we were walking on the gorgeous marina to troll for souvenirs in its plethora of shops, my blood started to boil after we were stopped by the fourth or fifth person trying to sign us up for another timeshare presentation. We actually had a limited amount of time to walk the marina before attending the presentation we’d already signed up for, and I didn’t want to waste it by stopping for a “hey amigos!” and sales pitch every 10 feet. My much more patient boyfriend was able to calm me down, however, by reminding me that we had a whole week in PV and could return to the marina as much as we wanted.
The presentation at Club Regina, I’m sorry to say, did not help my agitation. While the free lunch was tasty, I had wished it was Mexican instead of an American chicken, potato and vegetable spread. And that 90 minute promise was a total joke. After three hours of listening to the sales pitch, I bailed for the pool and let my boyfriend hear the rest of it on our behalf (again, bless his heart).
The ambiance at the pool erased all hard feelings I’d started to form against good, old Regina. The water in all three pools was glistening, the tropical music was pumping and the smell emanating from the poolside bar & grill was tantalizing. I slipped onto one of the built-in lounge chairs in the pool and let all remaining tension float away.
It was at this point that the trip went from enjoyable to amazing. Being in PV in off-season (late spring to early summer when it rains just a bit), we did get extra attention from all of the various salespeople. From timeshare properties and hotels to restaurants, tour guides and souvenir shops, everywhere we went we were beckoned to “come inside” and “look around.” However, the extra attention did work to our advantage on more than one occasion. On our first trip into downtown Puerto Vallarta (about a 15 minute bus ride from the marina area), we were treated to the most spectacular table in the restaurant, Viejo Vallarta. Munching on a mouth-watering platter of Mexican favorites including tacos, enchiladas and chili rellenos, the view from the second floor of this restaurant down to the bustling malecon (boardwalk), made the food taste even sweeter. The entertainment was non-stop as we watched tourists pose in front of the famous sea horse statue and the “flying pole dancers” climb to the top of a pole equipped with a series of ropes and float back down to the ground maypole style. A twinge of annoyance set in when one of the flyers actually walked into the restaurant to collect tips, but it soon dissipated when my eyes met a stunning, orange sunset transitioning the malecon from a bustling family tourist attraction to a hip nightlife scene with every type of club you could imagine.
Unfortunately for us, we picked the wrong club. The gregarious young men who served as activities directors at Club Regina talked us into buying some tickets from them for “the best club in Puerto Vallarta,” called Christine. Luckily, we did not have cash on us by the pool and arranged to pay them later. This definitely worked in our favor because after 30 minutes of having my eardrums assaulted by Bon Jovi as I watched droves of bikini-clad 19-year-olds pour in, I had no intention of paying the $30 US each we were asked for to enter this “amazing” club. I recommend that these otherwise amiable activities directors stick to their day jobs – leading fun games of poolside trivia and bingo and teaching us how to salsa dance and make piñatas – and leave the nightlife alone.
Despite the excruciating three hours, the timeshare presentation worked in our favor in the long run when we scored perks like free access to the immaculate, well-equipped
Club Regina gym (I even worked out once!), as well as free and discounted tours around the city. The free tour was mostly another sales trap that left the paying customers quite disgruntled. Stopping at a series of places to buy things – a candy cart, a high-priced silver purveyor and a ridiculously high-priced lunch stop – there were few individuals who decided to stick with the bus tour for its entirety. For us, though, having not paid for the tour itself, the $70 lunch bill wasn’t quite as mortifying, and I’d be wrong if I didn’t admit that the platter of ribs, tacos, steak and other hearty Mexican fare wasn’t finger-lickin’ good.
The tour was also a great opportunity for a change of pace. In the bus, we were able to ride up to the Romantic Zone, which we otherwise would not have known even existed. It is here where the rich and famous choose to play when they’re in town, and it is also the scene of various movie filmings. Situated high atop a hill overlooking the turquoise ocean and a series of giant stone arches (los arcos) jutting out of the water, I can see why. Having also gotten a free tequila tasting out of this tour (mmmm – chocolate tequila), and paid just 50 cents or so for the sweetest piece of candy I’ve ever tasted (guava flavored), I was a happy camper.
Another entertaining way to spend the day in PV is to do a Canopy Tour (aka, zip lining). It’s hard not to have fun when you are flying through the trees like Tarzan, and the instructors make you feel so comfortable that it’s much more joyous and liberating than frightening. If you go with the same tour we did – Mountain Adventures – you’ll get a double-dose of thrill riding as you drive to and from the mountain on an ATV with very few rules about speed and traffic protocol. If you’re like me, you’ll choose to just ride on the back while a more daring friend or family member drives, and just enjoy the very real (but slightly depressing) scenes of poor, rural Mexico. Don’t forget to hang on for dear life, though, as you reflect on the state of the countryside. Throw in another tequila tasting and a simple, yet explosively flavorful meal of cheese tacos, chips and salsa as Mountain Adventures did, and I’m once again fully satiated and smiling ear to ear.
Not to be outdone by the other two tours, our last tour was equally jaw-dropping (a nice juxtaposition to the teeth-clenching I was more prone to at the beginning of the trip). This one was your typical free-tropical-drink, party boat trip to some of the more remote areas of Puerto Vallarta. Crunching on the complimentary cucumber and jicama slices with chili sauce, I marveled at the stunning views of the hilly terrain dotted with colorful domiciles, then once again at los arcos as we made our way towards them. It turns out these views were better than our underwater views as we tried to snorkel around los arcos. I’m not sure if it is always like this in PV, or if it was just that time of year, but the water was extremely cloudy. There were plenty of fish down there, but they were very hard to spot.
On to Los Animos beach, I was ready to try something I’d been pining over all week – parasailing. After paying about $60 US total to one of the many parasailing operators on the beach, my boyfriend and I were suspended in mid-air in complete and total silence. This was an experience like no other. The sounds of the beach-goers frolicking below had completely disappeared and the only sounds we could hear were each other. I expected it to be windy and jostling up there, but it didn’t even feel like we were moving. It was literally like we were sitting in the atmosphere quietly observing life below. Simply amazing.
Not to be outdone by the other two tours, our last tour was equally jaw-dropping (a nice juxtaposition to the teeth-clenching I was more prone to at the beginning of the trip). This one was your typical free-tropical-drink, party boat trip to some of the more remote areas of Puerto Vallarta. Crunching on the complimentary cucumber and jicama slices with chili sauce, I marveled at the stunning views of the hilly terrain dotted with colorful domiciles, then once again at los arcos as we made our way towards them. It turns out these views were better than our underwater views as we tried to snorkel around los arcos. I’m not sure if it is always like this in PV, or if it was just that time of year, but the water was extremely cloudy. There were plenty of fish down there, but they were very hard to spot.
On to Los Animos beach, I was ready to try something I’d been pining over all week – parasailing. After paying about $60 US total to one of the many parasailing operators on the beach, my boyfriend and I were suspended in mid-air in complete and total silence. This was an experience like no other. The sounds of the beach-goers frolicking below had completely disappeared and the only sounds we could hear were each other. I expected it to be windy and jostling up there, but it didn’t even feel like we were moving. It was literally like we were sitting in the atmosphere quietly observing life below. Simply amazing.
Overall, Los Animos beach was pretty, but it was the parasailing and water sports that were the real draw. Other activities available included jet skiing and banana boat rides. And lastly, while it cost $11 US for two, the lemonade at the little restaurant on this island was by far the best lemonade I’ve ever had in my life. In general, lemonade was dreamy just about everywhere in PV, but this one was kicked up one more notch and served in a gigantic glass. What makes lemonade so special in PV is that it’s actually made with limes, so it’s a lot more tangy, and it’s always cut with a little club soda to mellow it out and give it a hint of fizz – divine!
A trip to Puerto Vallarta is really what you make it. If you let yourself get caught up in its little annoyances, it could easily ruin your trip. But if you’re patient, tolerant and understanding, or lucky enough (like me) to travel with someone who possesses those qualities, the good times are endless.
If you are an active person, there’s no shortage of activities and areas to explore in PV. And if you prefer to relax, you’re also in luck with properties like Club Regina equipped with multiple pools, ocean-side beaches and dining facilities within feet of your room. How much money you spend in PV is also completely up to you. While opportunities to spend - and spend big - greet you on every corner, there are definitely ways to do this trip on a modest budget. If you spend a little time reviewing the travel brochures available at all the hotels, you can easily find restaurants that accommodate budgets of all sizes. And of course, there’s always great street food available for just a few dollars on the malecon. From tacos and roasted corn to aguas frescas (refreshing beverages made with interesting ingredients like rice and tamarind), the downtown area of PV boasts an enticing array of tasty treats for all palates. Even picky eaters should fare well in PV. Personally, I don’t know who wouldn’t go gaga over the nice, thick tortilla chips and scorching hot salsa served with just about every meal. But if Mexican food is not you’re thing, there’s also perfectly decent food from other regions to be had in PV. I had a lovely grilled fish and rice meal at a steakhouse on the marina, as well as an excellent Chinese meal a few restaurants down, both extremely affordable in the $20 - $30 range for two.
And the number one tip for saving money in Puerto Vallarta – BARGAIN. While the price of food is usually set in stone, you can pretty much haggle for anything else you want in PV, from activities like parasailing to souvenirs. Never pay the first price offered for such items. Normally if you linger over something long enough without giving in, the salesperson will start the bargaining process for you, offering a lower price so you don’t walk away. After all, for many people in PV, their livelihood and that of their families is dependant upon you buying something from them. And the same goes for waiters and bartenders who heavily depend on tourists’ tips, and will always go the extra mile to increase the money you leave on the table for them.
In a way PV’s dependence on tourism allows those of us with modest budgets to get a taste of the good life we normally wouldn’t experience stateside. This became evident on our last evening in PV when we were relaxing at the outdoor bar, Nikki Beach, at Club Regina, enjoying some delightful tropical beverages followed by chocolate cake (hey, we were on vacation). Overlooking the ocean, we spotted the infamous, authentic-looking pirate ship that continuously traverses PV’s seas. While the ship itself is a tourist attraction geared towards children, we had been hearing that it sets off fireworks over the ocean nightly, but had not yet been lucky enough to see them. When my boyfriend asked about the fireworks, the bartender joked that if we left a nice tip, he could try to get the boat to light up the sky by Nikki Beach that night. Well, at least we thought he was joking until the ship made its way as close to shore by Nikki Beach as possible and gave us a romantic show of fireworks reflecting over the water. The hotel beach being practically deserted that night, it was my first (and probably only) private fireworks show. The combination of the waves quietly lapping at my feet, the cool breeze in the air, the bright colors lighting up the pitch dark sky and my boyfriend’s warm hand in mine made for a fantasy ending to a charming week.
If you are an active person, there’s no shortage of activities and areas to explore in PV. And if you prefer to relax, you’re also in luck with properties like Club Regina equipped with multiple pools, ocean-side beaches and dining facilities within feet of your room. How much money you spend in PV is also completely up to you. While opportunities to spend - and spend big - greet you on every corner, there are definitely ways to do this trip on a modest budget. If you spend a little time reviewing the travel brochures available at all the hotels, you can easily find restaurants that accommodate budgets of all sizes. And of course, there’s always great street food available for just a few dollars on the malecon. From tacos and roasted corn to aguas frescas (refreshing beverages made with interesting ingredients like rice and tamarind), the downtown area of PV boasts an enticing array of tasty treats for all palates. Even picky eaters should fare well in PV. Personally, I don’t know who wouldn’t go gaga over the nice, thick tortilla chips and scorching hot salsa served with just about every meal. But if Mexican food is not you’re thing, there’s also perfectly decent food from other regions to be had in PV. I had a lovely grilled fish and rice meal at a steakhouse on the marina, as well as an excellent Chinese meal a few restaurants down, both extremely affordable in the $20 - $30 range for two.
And the number one tip for saving money in Puerto Vallarta – BARGAIN. While the price of food is usually set in stone, you can pretty much haggle for anything else you want in PV, from activities like parasailing to souvenirs. Never pay the first price offered for such items. Normally if you linger over something long enough without giving in, the salesperson will start the bargaining process for you, offering a lower price so you don’t walk away. After all, for many people in PV, their livelihood and that of their families is dependant upon you buying something from them. And the same goes for waiters and bartenders who heavily depend on tourists’ tips, and will always go the extra mile to increase the money you leave on the table for them.
In a way PV’s dependence on tourism allows those of us with modest budgets to get a taste of the good life we normally wouldn’t experience stateside. This became evident on our last evening in PV when we were relaxing at the outdoor bar, Nikki Beach, at Club Regina, enjoying some delightful tropical beverages followed by chocolate cake (hey, we were on vacation). Overlooking the ocean, we spotted the infamous, authentic-looking pirate ship that continuously traverses PV’s seas. While the ship itself is a tourist attraction geared towards children, we had been hearing that it sets off fireworks over the ocean nightly, but had not yet been lucky enough to see them. When my boyfriend asked about the fireworks, the bartender joked that if we left a nice tip, he could try to get the boat to light up the sky by Nikki Beach that night. Well, at least we thought he was joking until the ship made its way as close to shore by Nikki Beach as possible and gave us a romantic show of fireworks reflecting over the water. The hotel beach being practically deserted that night, it was my first (and probably only) private fireworks show. The combination of the waves quietly lapping at my feet, the cool breeze in the air, the bright colors lighting up the pitch dark sky and my boyfriend’s warm hand in mine made for a fantasy ending to a charming week.
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